Dan Merchant - It's amazing how much energy it takes to ignore all of the things that I do wrong and only focus on the things that you do wrong. It consumes us. That's not something that we can do as casually as we pretend it is. When I'm focused on what you're doing wrong, I'm absolutely off of the trail on what God has for me to do. If I'm focused on your mistakes, there isn't room for anything else, like my own.
It's not my job to judge you outside of the context of a relationship. Paul talks about admonition for fellow believers and that implies a relationship and a common set of beliefs. If I'm out doing something I shouldn't be doing, and somebody that I have a relationship with speaks to me, I might listen because I know that you know me and you care about me. But if you don't know me, then you're going to get punched in the mouth when you tell me that I'm going to hell. That's the way people react. That's not how we're told to engage each other.
Kim Jones - That is so true. We do such horrible things to each other because we can be so messed up.
Dan Merchant - I harp on this whole "I'm not judging other people thing" partly because I'm acutely aware of how unqualified for that job I am. I'm pretty sure nobody out there is any more qualified to do it than me, so how about we not take that job on? How about we do the job that God gave us, which is love him and love others?
Kim Jones - Absolutely! It seems so easy—at least the concept of it. But then you start factoring in our own prejudices, preconceived notions, grudges and the things that make you go "ooh!" and it stops being easy.
Dan Merchant - Here's the thing that I learned about that. It's kind of a secret weapon. This whole idea of being right about everything, I can do that all by myself. But this loving one another thing, a simple idea for sure, well the execution is almost impossible except when I rely on God. That seems to me like a giant clue. Being right and straightening people out, I can do on my own, but being kind to people when I don't feel like being kind, loving them when I feel like they're unlovable and seeing them like He does ... I have to have God to help me with that. Clearly that is the right path ... If I take the other path, then I'm leaving God behind. If I really want to know God, then I'm going to go down the hard road with him. That was a big revelation for me. That was when I realized that I can't even begin to get close to the whole loving one another thing without relying on him for patience, strength, understanding and compassion that is beyond my own capacity.
Kim Jones - Easy stops being easy when you actually start trying to do it.
Dan Merchant - Oh, I know! You want to say, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure God, but have you met this guy? Seriously! Love hertoo?" I wrote a book called Lord Save Us From Your Followers and put a comic book section in the middle. Jesus is giving the Sermon on the Mount and the beatitudes. Basically, he's interrupted by figures from history who are trying to help, but kind of screw it up. One of them is a crusader, killing a Turk, saying, "I claim this land in the name of the Lord." And Jesus says, "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Don't do that in my name!" He tells a Republican to love everyone, and the guy says, "Even the Liberals?" Jesus says, "Yes, even the Liberals."
We think that there is an exception to the rule. There's no asterisk in the Book that says, "You know what? You don't have to love the gay people or the Hispanic people. You don't have to love the Canadians or the Muslim people. You don't have to love the people in the suburbs." There's no loophole. That's what makes his sacrifice on the cross so magnificent. He died for everybody. It's up to us to accept the gift.
Kim Jones - It sounds like such a no-brainer but somehow we manage to mess it up.
Dan Merchant - I know! I know! That's what makes it a faith journey. It's not like we can say, "Oh, let me check the box and get my faith squared away, and then I'll go down to Safeway and grab some steaks." It's a work in progress. Some days we do it better than others. Hopefully, we grow to understand him a little better each day.
Kim Jones - Once this tour is over, how do you go back to being Dan at home?
Dan Merchant - I'm working with Thomas Nelson, the publishers of my first book, on another one called, Loving Kindness Actually Works. And it really does!
Fortunately, my wife and kids have been involved in this movie. It's so much easier to talk to people "out there" than it is to be patient with your family when you're tired. But that's part of the deal. We've got to remember to treat our family better than we treat everyone else and we had better be treating everyone else really, really well.
I get that you can let your hair down, but don't take your family for granted. It's difficult to really care for people when you know all of their junk. My wife has a burden because she really knows me. This is loving one another thing is the little things. It's walking across the street to visit with the neighbor you haven't seen in a month because you've been so busy. It's understanding the gifts that God gave you and how he wants you to apply them right where you are ... in the street, at the school where you drop your kids off, in the supermarket. The mundane stuff is where the magic can happen. It doesn't have to be a grand trip to Africa to reach out and find people in need and help however you can. If the gospel is what you really believe, then that is what you signed up for!
