Introduction
Gwen spent most of her life searching for the love she lacked in childhood. The void quickly filled with empty depression, until one day she was suddenly diagnosed with a terminal illness. That was when she cried out to God and He intervened. Gwen was not only given a miraculous extension of years, but also a heart fulfilled with unshakable hope, joy, and peace.This account is one of our featured testimonies from you, the members and visitors of this site. Each story reveals a life transformed by Christian faith. If your relationship with God has made a significant difference in your life, we would like to hear about it. Submit your testimony by filling out this Submission Form.
Gwen's Search - From Worthlessness to Abundant Love
Meeting Christ was the best thing I could have ever imagined in my life. You see, I came from a family where faith in God was not practiced. We believed there was a God, but we did not live like we believed.
My father was mentally and physically abusive, and my mother pulled the house together the best way she knew how. She loved us, working two jobs to give us the best life she could. But all I ever wanted was my parent's love and approval. As a child, I did things just to get their attention. Even if they spanked me or punished me, I thought it showed they loved me. So I grew up not knowing the real meaning of love.
In my search for love, I had a child at age twenty. I knew she would love me no matter what I said or did, because I was her mother. I loved my mother the same way. I even married a man that my whole family told me not to, even though he was the father of my child. Our marriage was a rocky one. For years we fought and cheated on each other. I could not take it. I was drowning in feelings of worthlessness, and I desperately wanted only to be loved.
A Deep Depression
Finally, a deep depression set in. I didn't care if I lived or died. When my child was about six years old, I began drinking and partying so much that I stopped caring. I was looking everywhere for love and couldn't find it. One night my husband and I had another fight. I was planning to leave him for good. I was going to live with someone else, and just maybe I might find love. But God had other plans.
