Postponing life until marriage is one of the commonest traps singles can fall into.
We think, "When I'm married I'll do this…" or, "After I get married then I'll finally be happy…"
But marriage may be farther off than we think, and for some of us, marriage may not happen at all. Postponing life can start as a harmless wish but can turn into a self-limiting habit that keeps you from becoming the person God wants you to be.
For most of us singles, going places and doing things alone can be scary. One of God's best gifts is a good friend who's ready to go on the spur of the moment. Friendships like that have to be cultivated, which means we need to overlook others' faults. When we're honest enough to admit we have faults of our own, we can be forgiving of others. Simply practicing the Golden Rule can strengthen any relationship.
Take One Step at a TimeYour life gets bigger every time you trust God and step out in faith. At first you may feel apprehensive, but God can give you the courage you lack.
My friend Jane is a single woman who refused to postpone her life. She loves to travel, and many years ago she made up her mind that she was going to see the world. She has been all over the United States and Europe because she goes on group tours, where there is safety—and fun—in numbers.
But she hasn't been afraid to use her talent to serve God as well. An accomplished pianist, Jane plays for services at her own church and several others in the area. She serves on boards and committees that make our city a better place to live.
Jane didn't jump into all these activities at once. As she succeeded at one thing, she stepped out with another. Today she is a happy, well-liked person because she refused to postpone her life.
"I'm entitled to my fun."
While postponing your social life can be unhealthy, postponing your eternal life can be downright deadly.
Millions of single people believe they're entitled to their fun, which involves sex before marriage, alcohol, drugs, and anything else that's popular. They promise to settle down later, postponing the time when they will deal with God.
In his book, The Motivated Mind, J.M. Gracia tells the story of Ralph Ellis. Ralph calculated that the average person has about 3,900 Saturdays in their lifetime. About 60 years old, Ralph figured he had somewhere near 780 Saturdays left.
"Ralph filled a container with 780 marbles, and taped a small piece of paper to the front that read Saturdays. Each week, he would remove a single marble from the jar. In effect, he could see his remaining Saturdays slowly diminish."
That's a startling way to jolt yourself out of postponing your life. But for some people, death comes in the blink of an eye. Traffic accidents, random shootings, terrorism, and natural disasters can rob us of that moment when we thought we would secure our place in heaven.
Everyone who dies young thought they would live to a ripe old age. Sadly, for some of us that doesn't happen.
Don't Postpone It Any LongerIf you've been putting off the invitation of Jesus Christ, now is the time to decide where you will spend the rest of eternity.
The Bible is unmistakably clear: You can't get to heaven by doing good deeds, and you can't get there by being a good person. The only way is through accepting Christ as your savior.
Besides the priceless gift of salvation, Jesus will give you something else: his real, constant presence inside you, through the Holy Spirit. That may be the most mind-boggling truth in the universe.
As you let Christ live the Christian life through you, you'll find courage and determination you never had before. God will give you boldness to embark on an adventure that dwarfs anything the world has to offer.
The choice is up to you. Are you ready to stop postponing your life and start living it?
Jack Zavada, a career writer and contributor for About.com, is host to a Christian website for singles. Never married, Jack feels that the hard-won lessons he has learned may help other Christian singles make sense of their lives. His articles and ebooks offer great hope and encouragement. To contact him or for more information, visit Jack's Bio Page.